December 19, 2008, 11:24 pm
Filed under: my head will explode, sophron

[trivia of the day] today was pretty sad for me, i couldn’t focus and stuff. So i just went to watch twilight. and it was -.- . maybe i have lived out the days when i still like to fantasize and what not that most girls do, like now i’m not in the age of playing games anymore, so the movie was a bit ohkay heyy, it ended. that sorta thing. ohwell, maybe it’s time for me to watch artistic films, or maybe documentaries works well for me.
and yes, i do pray that ten years down the road, if ever i get bored of my job, i would resolve by being even closer to God instead of daydreaming or having doublelife.

[non-trivia of the day]

I know you stay true when my world is false
everything around’s breaking down to chaos
I always see you when my sight is lost
everything around’s breaking down to chaos
– Chaos, mute math

i love mute math, they just kinda fit the right words to the right situations.
i survived through yesterday, after fighting of my own self illusions. But not today, i tried to get the dragg feeling out of me by sleeping, bad method.
It would be better if i talk it out to God.
yea, i’ll do that.
yupp, so i went to sleep. EXCRUSH smsed me, but i didn’t wanna bother, i just feel sick and stuff. then the hour passed till i gotta go for meeting.
but thank God that didn’t last for long, i know i gotta change how i handle my feelings.

Today was really ohman. it didn’t feel like any other pre christmas, it felt like i dont feel well and i don’t even attempt to bother about things anymore. and what not.
It’s like really sigh, why? why? why?
i felt the same yesterday as night as well.
But i know, my leader felt ten million times more than me.
when i read the part about she wanted to drink detergent and die, i almost cried. 

BUT God is faithful. i hold it tight. i know he will do his work in his own timing, and the cg will do what we are called to do.
zhuyin prayed with me during the altarcall, and i guess prayer is not just plain blabbering, there’s the power in it we can never deny. Not only reassurance, but we lay everything down, and just hold tight to God in the rollercoaster ride, physically spiritually or emotionally.

it’s rare for me to say this, but yupp, we are still reaping the harvest. I’m still running with the consistent pace.
God in the picture, and love will naturally overflows:]


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